love, theoretically

My grand plans of blogging my way through our 13-month engagement have obviously utterly failed.  But now that I'm 4 days out, on our 3-year dating anniversary, here's something.

I feel like wedding planning is mostly driving all over the city, and spending money at every possible stop along the way.

But sometimes I remember to combine the spiritual with the geographical and I turn on Catholic Radio while I drive.  Lately I keep hearing really on-point marriage and family talks from this one priest, Fr. John Riccardo.  So the other night I was driving up north from PV and listening to a talk on Ephesians 5:21-33.  I have such a love affair with this passage that it's even being read at our wedding.  Click here if you want to read it real quick.

So Fr. Riccardo gave all this great insight on what the original Greek text meant when it came to the wife "submitting" to her husband, and what "headship" on behalf of the husband really means.  Maybe I'll get into that later, but here's what really struck me.  He said there is only one command in this passage, which is known as THE passage that tells husbands and wives how to have a holy marriage.  The command is: "Husbands, love your wives."  

God commands us to love so many times throughout his Word.  The fact that love can be commanded gives me hope.  Meaning...God would not and could not command us to love if it were simply a feeling, a rush of hormones or emotion that unpredictably fades.  And that makes it more powerful and so much more meaningful!  So many married couples have given us advice that basically says, "wake up every day and choose to love your spouse."  I am naive and have no idea what that's going to be like, but I know Sean is preparing himself to do the same.    

I've had people ask me, "are you nervous?"  I'm nervous about little things going wrong on wedding day or leading up to it, the normal things that I know don't really matter.  But am I nervous to get married?  Definitely not.  I know that even if my husband wakes up one day and doesn't feel like he is in love with me, he will choose to love me anyways.  Like Christ loves the Church.  And he can't love me perfectly on his own, (I'm not that loveable), but we'll receive grace from the sacrament of our marriage and be strengthened by the Holy Spirit to keep on keepin' on.       

Am I nervous?  Pssh...do you know this guy?   ;)

Airplane Bungalow

I think everyone has a special place in their heart for the first place they lived truly on their own.  I can't think of the Airplane Bungalow on Roanoke without thinking of Phil.  A week ago I went to his going away party.  "Some Nights" by Fun. came on and the dance floor went a little crazy.  Brie said, "Remember Phil and Bob dancing to this in your kitchen?"

Instantly I got flooded with nostalgia.  Of course I remember dancing in the kitchen, because it was huge and we always had a sink full of dirty dishes that could only get washed if the right music was on.  When we moved out, I cleaned the bottom cabinets for the first time and found the hole to the outside that the mice were using for transport.  Doesn't take away from how awesomely huge that kitchen was.

I worked nights in that house, so Phil would sometimes wake up in the morning and come downstairs to find me asleep at the dining room table.  Our basement was as scary as the one in Home Alone and you never knew what kind of Westport riffraff was going to walk down the sidewalk talking to himself.  We had a study, a conservatory, and a library (WITH BUILT IN BOOKSHELVES), and a porch couch.  You may think having a porch couch signifies white trash, but we would heartily disagree.  Porch couch means perfect summer nights with friends and beverages.  

I learned a lot about being a grown-up (when I wanted to be) in that house.  And when I moved out, I think life got a little more serious.  But what I miss most is not the house, but Phil.  I couldn't have asked for a more perfect roommate and friend.  After moving to our new homes, I didn't get to see him nearly as much as I wanted to.  But so many of my good memories from that time in my life have him in there somewhere.  He is one of the MOST talented people I think I will ever meet, and I'm so proud of him for working his ass off and getting after his dreams.  He and Mandy will have wonderful adventures, and they are going to be in my thoughts and prayers often.  

Best of luck, old friend.  Your city misses you already.